The Daftest Fib ever Told?

06/17/2021

When I was in Year 2, my teacher - the brilliant Mrs Walker - told me a fib that chilled me to the bone.

At age 6 (I go to great lengths to tell you that I don't do this anymore), I used to have a little munch of the luscious green grass on the school field. It was tasty, it was possibly nutritious, but on account of not being born a cow, it was a little odd.

Mrs Walker soon got wind of my little dietary habit and sat me down. She told me something that's stuck with me all these years later...

"Ryan," she said, "your face has turned green."

The horror! The grass was delicious, but it wasn't worth THAT. By the time I'd realised that I didn't actually resemble Shrek's younger brother, I'd already vowed that that was the end of my bovine diet.

What's the best, the daftest or the most unbelievable white lie you've ever been told?